1 April 2021 — DEMAND!
Because to ask politely means that the patriarchy wins,
Or is this just the natural consequence of having married
Uber-woak Soyboys?
130717 — The Babble of the Sexes
Men are almost impossible to understand.
When a man says that he’s looking for a wealthy hot babe with a hefty rack and an unquenchable thirst for fresh semen what he ACTUALLY means is that he’s looking for a wealthy hot babe with a hefty rack and an unquenchable thirst for fresh semen. I understand your confusion.
Women make more sense.
When a woman says she’s looking for a soulmate who will respect her womanhood, honor her individuality, and help her to actualize her best self, what she clearly means is that she’s looking for a jerk in a leather jacket to treat her like garbage.
See? MUCH simpler!
190929 — People are funnier than they realize.
It’s a pity they’re not as funny as they think.
191116 — “You know what I mean?” Okeh, so maybe you did speak in a Valley Girl accent. Still… If I’m supposed to infer that your declarative statement is a question, why don’t you infer that my not contradicting it is an answer?
200103 — Most people are horrible. Some people are worse.
But that’s just the majority.
200104 — Iran shoots intruder in neighbor’s house.
Intruder’s family vows revenge.
200105 — Wondering about That Old Guy at the QuikkStopp™
“Why are you always in such a fucking good mood?”
Because I live in a beautiful world filled with music, cats, literature,
poetry, pretty girls, and hard drugs.
“Are you for real?”
I may not be what you expected, but I exist.
200106 — “If it doesn’t come naturally, leave it.” – Al Stewart
He’s not entirely correct, but still…
Nothing fixes a frown so firmly on my face as the insistence that I smile.
Nothing slows me down as effectively as the insistence that I hurry.
200814 – Any time you ask me if it’s a quiet night, it automatically isn’t.
When you ask me how my “night’s going” you are making it worse. If the first word of your directive is “just” then I have already and automatically failed to comply.
210402 — If Lance has his genitals removed and declares his name is now Louise, I’m going to try to be polite and call him Louise.
By the same token, I generally call fake capitalists “Republicans,”
and fake humanitarians “Democrats.”
13 August 2021 – “Don’t Label Me, Bro” — or – “Gimme da Kine”
Most of the damage done by tools has been through their misuse. Most people wouldn’t care to be stabbed with a screwdriver or clobbered by a brick, but survivors would not likely blame the tools themselves.
The damage done with words (tools which denote or describe people, places, things, concepts, actions, or attributes) are accomplished through deceit or conflation. Deceit is usually clear, and often defensive, but conflation is sneakier. It is used to distort meanings and positions to link common characteristics with individual misbehaviors – it is an attempt to cover a broad concept with a narrow blanket, as if to say, “Oh, you’re not a ‘Republican?’ Then you must love Hillary.”
In a reflex that closely resembles “I am NOT my Daddy,” people frequently object to labels, as if they were to exclusively define them irrespective of however else they might differ from the pack. But labels are useful insofar as they help us grasp important differences. Most of us have a pretty good idea of what “give me a hand” means, but no one understands “that” or “da kine” outside of a context. If my mate can’t see me pointing at the spanner, I should probably use the suitable label.
“Oh! You’re with BLM? You must hate white people.”
“You’re a border hawk? Why do you hate Mexicans?”
“You’re a lib-uh-terian? Don’t you like roads?”